Slopapotamus Sighting

Last Friday started off as any other normal night. Had a few beers. Epic fail of using a grill. The usual stuff. All of the sudden though we started to hear an evil cackle. It was like a laugh but worse. The kind of laugh that makes a man want to jam a torpedo in his ear. We knew this could only mean one thing. There was a slapapotamus on the loose. For those of you who don’t know a Slapapotamus is its a cross between a slop tard and a hippopotamus, or a drunk chick with a questionable history of men. So we did what any man would do and jumped in our bat mobiles(my little sisters razor scooters) and headed to the little bear. Once we got there we thought it might have been a false alarm, but then my good friend whos name I will leave out for privacy purposes. Ill call him Jo Haertl. Jo spotted this eerie looking drunken figure in the corner of the bar and he knew it had to be it. He was correct, he had spotted a real life slapa. I thought they were myths. Thought they were just stories your parents told you so you would resist drugs and Alcohol. But folks they are real and living right here in my home town. To keep this short we will call the slapa Missy Young. Once Ho spotted this beast he knew he had to tame it. He instantly went up to catch it but it must have resisted because he had to resort to finagling his tongue into her mouth. He stayed over there “wrestling it” until the bars were closing. Now that Jo had caught the beast it was time for him to take his prey home and finish the capturing process. We tried to tell him he had done enough. He insisted that he would be heated if he knew he had had a slapa in his grasp and let it go. He would never forgive himself. We made It back to the house and we celebrated his catch by having some beers. Well Jo was busy but the rest of us laughed and joked all night. At the end of the day I was happy my friend was able to bang I mean bag a great catch. That was the end of the night and thanks for reading.